Patrick Stewart is one classy, badass dude, and has been the subject of my affections for years and years ever since I first laid eyes on him as Captain Jean-Luc Picard on “Star Trek: The Next Generation.”
Not only that, but Stewart’s been a Shakespearean actor for most of his life, eventually eking out a name for himself in the world of drama despite coming from an impoverished background as a child.
Sure, he’s a swarthy British man who’s been bald since he was 20, and yes, he is quite old now. The awesome thing is that you can barely tell how old he is (71) because of how gracefully he’s aged. Like a fine wine… actually, you know what? More than that. He’s made of pure crystallized awesome—a wondrous stalactite that’s only grown larger and more impressive over the years on the ceiling of the world’s collective metaphorical cave of beautiful human beings.
Seriously, though, aside from how much I respect the man for what he’s done and where he’s come from, he just oozes cool and likability. Not only that, but his voice is probably the most satisfying sound in the world, being rich and full of character that can only be obtained from years of professionalism and experience. I could listen to him talk for days, if possible.
Also, yeah, I’ll say it: I think he’s handsome in a badass older guy way. Don’t judge. He’s more of a man than you or I will ever be, and so for that I will always have a mancrush on Patrick Stewart.
Ryan Gosling | Christian Law
Listen up fellas! I know you’ve been on a lot of dates. I’ve been on my fair share of romance adventures with the ladies, just like you have. You take her to White Castle, hang out at your local gas station and buy her some Necco candies to seal the deal. Sounds like a typical win, right?
Let me tell you about a certain night in my life. At 8 o’ clock, just as he promised, Ryan Gosling picked me up at my house. He waited
patiently, spoke kindly to my parents and then took me to a carnival. After winning me a stuffed bear and a turkey leg, he drives me to the hills to watch the sunset. Then, the honorable Mr. Gosling offered me his scorpion jacket as we sat arm in arm and whispered sweet nothings. And you know what? He called me back!
The point of this story is to say that Ryan Gosling is just perfect. The man is the definition of a southern gentleman without the slightly racist accent. After his romance with Rachel McAdams, he told the media, “She was one of the great loves of my life.”
No one else says that. What makes Gosling the best mancrush ever is that he can easily be imagined in any memorable romantic coupling in Hollywood history. For example, place him in the bar in “Casablanca,” and the image works. Replace Cary Elwes with Gosling in “The Princess Bride” and BAM! A perfect movie is made doubly perfect.
Part Bogart, part Clooney and part awesome musician (check out his band Dead Man’s Bones), Ryan Gosling is the perfect man for all of us. He stopped calling me, but he will always be the greatest love of my life.
Nathan Fillion | Blake Tan
When it comes to manly man-gods, there are very few things that top cowboys. A cowboy is a man’s man – rough-shaven, grizzled paragons of masculinity roaming the badlands with nothing but their six-shooter and trusty steed. What could be better?
I’ll tell you: a space cowboy. His six-shooter is a fusion of futuristic and old-school tech and his steed is a faithful, old starship. The first time I ever saw Nathan Fillion as Malcolm Reynolds in Joss Whedon’s ill-fated yet still remarkable sci-fi TV series, “Firefly,” and the follow-up movie, “Serenity,” I knew that this man was my captain.
He’s one-part Wyatt Earp, one-part Han Solo, and all-parts awesome. He doesn’t bother with the illusions of sophistication or society; he’s a simple man, just trying to get by. But if you cross him or his crew, he’s not afraid to shoot first. If he asked me to, I would follow him into the jaws of hell – and gladly.
“Firefly” is done and (despite the clamoring of its fans) unlikely to be revived, and Nathan Fillion has moved on to greener pastures, like “Castle,” but I will always remember him as the bold, daring man “who aims to misbehave.”
Joseph Gordon-Levitt | Isaac Noland
Joseph Gordon-Levitt is a beautiful, tender man. But he will kick your ass.
In “(500) Days of Summer” we see his soft side, wooing the hipster-goddess Zooey Deschanel. We watch him fall in love and grow as an individual. We watch him break into dance. We cheer for him when and we feel his pain as he cracks under the pressure of a relationship going under.
As Arthur in “Inception” he is cool, calm and calculating as he dispatches goons in shifting or zero gravity. Not to mention his obvious intelligence as one of Leo’s gang of mind-freakers.
JGL also suffered through cancer in “50/50”, earning his second Golden Globe nomination for the emotional tale of friendship, love and mortality. He can dance, he can romance, he can kill… he can be in absurd classic NBC comedies opposite John Lithgow. Joseph Gordon-Levitt is the perfect man. If I were Zooey Deschanel, I never would have dumped him.
Tom Hardy | Sam Flynn
I am openly heterosexual. I came out to my parents at a very young age but, though they struggled with my identity, they came to love and accept me for who I am: a female-loving male. However, suddenly my entire worldview was thrown for a loop when I saw Tom Hardy’s minor role in “Black Hawk Down.”
Immediately, I knew I (hypothetically) wanted to spend the rest of my life with those luscious lips. Even in that small role, he stood out to me as an actor to watch. So it was with great “pleasure” that I watched his star rise over the years culminating with a role in “Inception,” which opened the flood gates for my Tom Hardy mancrush.
Now we are in a Tom Hardy Renaissance, with co-romantic lead with Chris Pine in “This Means War” coming out on Valentine’s Day and the primary villain role of Bane in the final Batman trilogy capper “The Dark Knight Rises,” reuniting him with his “Inception” director Christopher Nolan. His ability to morph physically and mentally in roles is clear by his repeated weight loss and gains for films such as “Bronson” and “Warrior.”
His acting follows in the footsteps of Marlon Brando and James Dean as a tortured rebel. One day, I will sweep him off his feet, even if my girlfriend/wife has a problem with it. Until then, I will content myself with his masterful performances. And those luscious lips.
Oh hey, do you also have some ridiculous mancrushes that you can’t let anybody else know about? Tweet at us!